Amsterdamned – tape 1259

Here’s a true hidden gem. Dutch filmmaker Dick Maas got some UK distribution for his fun thriler set on the canals of Amsterdam called, cleverly, Amsterdamned. A monster is stalking the canals of Amsterdam, and cop Eric Visser (Huub Stapel) has to get to the bottom of it.

This is a subtitled version, so there’s a certain kitschy veneer to it. I won’t reveal the true identity of the monster in case you ever come across this on Netflix.

There’s a great opening with a tour boat filed with children coming across a grisly sight.

Before the movie there’s a trailer for Stakeout. Then an ITN news bulletin.

Following the movie, there’s a trailer for a Jeremy Brett Sherlock Holmes story, The Master Blackmailer. After some ads there’s a trailer for the Penelope Keith political sitcom No Job For A Lady.

Then we have something that’s actually quite a puzzler. It’s a film from the Children’s Film Foundation called The Johnstown Monster. Now, I’m assuming Amsterdamned would have been shown late at night, so why would a CFF production be shown even later? It’s rather perplexing.

A CFF Production

To further confuse me, this film is followed by Cartoon Time. There’s a Looney Tunes cartoon, Wholly Smoke. This is a cartoon I doubt would be shown today, featuring as it does, lots of cigars and cigarettes in a tobacconist, singing and dancng. It’s a very early Porky Pig short.

Following this, there’s Fistic the Mystic, starring Merlin the Magic Mouse and Second Banana.

The last cartoon on this tape is Gone Batty. The tape stops during this short.

So, we have a fairly gory horror film, followed by two programmes for children. When was this scheduled? It will forever be a mystery. Whenever it was, it’s some time around the New Year, on ITV.

Update: Having done a bit of sleuthing, this tape dates from 1st January 1992, at 2:30am. A late night horror film makes perfect sense, it’s the idea that there might be an audience for a Children’s Film Foundation movie at 4:30am followed by cartoons that boggles my mind.

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